It's been a while

I can't believe how long I haven't been to this site! Let alone, updating it.

How are you?

I guess I'm pretty good. Been back for the summer for about 2 months, now one more month before I get back to the land of freedom.

What are you up to?

A few projects came up, which I was a part of, in front and behind the camera, so I've been working on that since the day I came home. Now with the shootings all done, it pretty much ended and I'm free again.

Also, visited China and Hong Kong and returned to the boring life of Summer. However, after watching Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part II, which is also the last film of Harry Potter, I noticed two tall identical figures that I have never set my eyes upon before. That's right. They're the Weasley twins. Also known as James and Oliver Phelps, the Phelps twins in real life. Yup. The reason I'm up here today is to tell you about my obsession over this pair of twins!

Honestly, I haven't been this obsessed with a certain thing, or a certain person before, but these twins are handsome! Cute! Gorgeous! They're funny, like Fred and George Weasley, they crack jokes, play pranks on sets. They're just plain awesome. Did I tell you that they're handsome too?

I've been digging out their interviews and scenes in every HP movies for the past few weeks and still doing it. Probably because I have the time and I love them. To tell you the truth, I never read any of the HP books before. I did watch the first and second HP films, but the rest I just fell asleep in the cinema halfway through the movie. But when I saw these two pranksters, I know I'm in love. I knew I had to read the books and watch every HP movie to find out what Fred & George were up to from the start.

Lookit em! Aren't they adorable?

Cheers! :)

So I'm missing out a lot in the Summer.
So no one wants to hang out with me.
So no one appreciates me.
So I'm not fun enough.
So I couldn't take jokes.
So I am defensive.
So I am not good in talking.
So I am bad in communicating.

So I am going to hide in my shell.
No sun, no one, no summer.

The truth can be harsh. And the truth is, I am alone in this world. No matter how many friends I have, in the end I will fall back alone. Yes, they are there to support you. But how much further will they go to support you? Will they hold the sky for you when it falls? Or will they say, "I will be in spirit with you! Just hold on!"? A friend is a friend. They are meant to support you mentally. They are not who clean up after you after you made a mess.

We all have our obligations. Friends could be with you one second, but the other second they could be away. So you have to always be able to stand on your own. Be strong, be independent.

I am a social creature. Yet I am afraid of opening up to new things.
I am desperately in need of friends. Yet I am afraid of asking for one.
When I am told that I will be living alone, I was lost. All of a sudden the path that I was walking on disappeared. The person I was holding on to all the time was gone. I was left in darkness.
I was depressed. Being alone hurts me most.
Am I not able to walk on my own? Have I always been walking on others' feet, letting them carry me wherever I go, with me just compromising them?

Maybe.

That is why I have not been able to make my own decision. I don't know what's good for me. I don't know what I want.

But I cannot.

Sometimes I just want to say in people's face:

You are ugly.
You are fat.
You are fussy.
You sleep too much.
You talk too much.
Shut up.
I am the best.
I am the prettiest.
I am the nicest.
You are nothing compared to me.
You are a loser.
I play the piano better than you.
I hate your face.
I hate the way you talk.
You are irritating.
You are annoying.




But I cannot.

Home

I've been thinking about this a lot. Four more months til I get home and what I should do when I get back.

Stay in for one whole week. Explore my new house, rolling on my new bed, chase after my dogs, spear my own fishes.
Go to the gym. But in order to do that I must get used to driving again. Else I'll need to walk in extremely hot weather or learn how to take a bus.
Create a 10 course meal for dinner. It can be that, or have a 10 course meal at a Chinese restaurant. <3
Be Queen for a day. Do whatever I want. HEE.
Eat roti canai for breakfast! Since I'll be arriving at 6am. WOOHOO.

3 and a half hours til the end of 2010.

Ma ne (Well), I was kind of hoping I could end 2010 with a blast. Guess that couldn't be done anymore.

My 2010 has been an awesome one. So what if it doesn't have a perfect ending to it?

In this year, I met a lot of new people, met lotsa new friends. Had crushes, had my heartbroken, or rather, it was self ignite. I got a job, quit a job and entered a new college. I came to a place that is ever so new. I had to adapt myself to the new culture. I became independent, with my parents not around to help me.

I am a person who usually knows what I want. I also know what I need to improve over the new year. I'm going to make a short but essential new year resolution.

1. Make more new friends
2. I tend to hide up my feelings. I need to be more open about how I feel of people.
3. Stop being jealous of everything I don't have. Because I already have most things one could ever dream of.
4. Appreciate my friends more than finding fault in them. Learn to forgive.
5. Climb up when you fall. Everything's gonna be alright. :)

Happy New Year 2011 everyone. :) Have a great year ahead. I'm sure it will be. If only you believe. But don't just dream. Make it happen. ;)

Wow.

The last post was written in November. I see. I have abandoned this blog for a long time now. If, one month is even considered long.

I'm not even sure if there is anyone reading this anymore. But to those of you who still looks out for an update of my life, this post is definitely what you're looking for.

To start off, I'd like to let you know that it is the finals week of the Fall semester. Projects are due this week and final exams kicked off this morning (though some may have started last week). I'm just stealing some time to write a blog post. You can also call this procrastination. :P

Since the day I arrived here. I realized a drastic change in my internet life. I used to appear on msn every single day but today, I don't even bother to check my msn anymore. In fact, it's Facebook everyday now. So I'm a FB addict. So what? Everyone is. You are one too. :P

I live in a place filled with great musicians, which also gives me motivation to do things I've never thought of doing before. Recently, I want to write songs and also remix songs. The thoughts came after listening to people's work. I thought they were great and I can do that too. I would definitely give it a try after finals.

I had some tunes rearranged for my projects. It may not be the greatest work on Earth, but I thought I did pretty well. It's all up to you to judge. If you would, please click here to listen. :)

Ever since I started having private instructions in Berklee, I realized how bad my techniques were. Eew. I suck. :/ But that doesn't matter. Because I am working hard. And I will improve. The only matter is, how long will it take?

Berklee is truly an amazing place. Boston is amazing. The United States is fucking amazing. I love being here. I met lots of new people here. They may differ in terms of culture, race and skin colour. But they definitely have something in common. They are nice.

As much as I love being here, I really do miss the luxuries I have at home. Having your dishes washed by someone is one of them. Throw your dirty clothes in the laundry basket and have them clean and nicely folded in the closet the next day. Unmade bed? Dirty floor? Come back to your room after breakfast and see the floor sparkle like jewels and the bed nicely made. Oh, the luxuries. Of course I do miss my parents as well. Who else would drive me to supper? And my grandmother. I bother her when I'm bored. And my brother. I annoy the hell outta him and get a good laugh. xD

There seems to be a little health problem here. But everything's going to be fine. I know it. :)

That pretty much summarizes up my absence for the whole month or more. It would mark the starting of my first winter break end of this week. And I hope to be in New York in the holidays.

I have Conducting final tomorrow at 9am, three other exams and one audition coming up. Good luck to me. And good luck to you!